suckfest 2008

this post is dedicated to sherry carpet, who is the only one who's voted as of 10:48 pm est.

ok. i'm not sure who the andersons are, or why they suck, but apparently they do. another friend of mine joined the revolution; apparently it's cool. and since i rock, here are 20 reasons why i suck. keep in mind, this is not an attempt to get you to tell me how wonderful i am (i already know that i rock - try to listen), just an attempt at being real.

1 - i really dislike judgemental people. sometimes i really don't like people at all. especially when said people are a large mob of lds singles. they give me anxiety.
2 - i am very judgemental, particularly of judgemental people.
3 - i pretty much always think i'm right.
4 - i'm very selfish. i talk a lot about myself, but don't always bother to ask the other person about him/herself. i suck at turning off lights, doing my dishes, not leaving my stuff lying around, locking the top bolt on the door, taking out the trash, cleaning in general...i have become THAT roommate (my excuse...see #12).
5 - i don't sleep enough, and then complain that i'm tired all the time.
6 - i am over indulgent and/or have no self control. i can't go a day without chocolate and diet coke.* in fact, i think my diet consists of 2 parts diet coke, 1 part sugar, 1 part whatever i can scrounge out of the fridge/cupboard, with a healthy dose of tv. not that i have time to watch tv.
7 - i have major pack-rat tendancies. i don't clean up after myself and thus can't find anything...the stamp i KNOW i've seen in the recent past, the black tablecloth i want to use in my studio, my keys, my phone...yesterday i left them in the studio bathroom and a fellow artist returned them to me. she washed her hands first.
8 - i procrastinate everything. even things that will make me happy, like scheduling a massage. "i'll do it tomorrow..."
9 - i'm very easily distracted.
10 -
11 - i rarely finish projects that i start. i like to plan them, but not finish them. it takes too long. (see #9)
12 - i always think i can do more in a day than is humanly possible, even for superwoman. thus, the boring parts of my extensive don't get completed. as a result, i have not been grocery shopping in a month nor done laundry, but know who won project runway (see #6), went dancing, caught up with a friend, and applied for a job.
13 - i play devil's advocate even if i disagree what i'm advocating, particularly if i think the person is misinformed, or i think they're giving a knee-jerk response or if i just don't like their tone.
14 - as my childhood friend laura used to tell me, i think i'm funny when i'm not. but even when i'm not, i still think i am. and sometimes i think being mean is funny.
15 - i'm over-sensitive and pick apart every insult, slight and backhanded comment, but don't necessarily think twice about the ones i've handed out over the years.
16 - i speak in absolutes even though it annoys me when other people (like newscasters) do it.
17 - i correct people's grammar. and grammar/spelling errors in ads. i mean, seriously, people...if you're going to publish something to millions of people, do you really want to look like an idiot?
18 - i eat baby animals. and i don't really feel bad. maybe a little bit. but really, is it any worse to eat a baby than it is to eat its mother? i submit to you that it is not. also, i saw a t-shirt once that said, "meat is murder...tasty tasty murder" and i thought it was funny.
19 - i stress out about driving anywhere/anyplace i'm unfamiliar. my least favorite thing to do is drive around in an unfamiliar area, in an unfamiliar car (like a rental) looking for someplace i'm not sure exits, particularly using googlemaps. once i took a classmate's head off when i was driving for a school trip. not literally.
20 - i suck at moderation. yesterday i ate a half bag of dove dark chocolates before noon. today i ate the rest. before 10am. i cannot limit my intake of anything. as soon as i tell myself i'm setting a limit, i immediately want more. so when i tell myself, only 20 oz of dc today, i, of course drink 60, even though the past few days i've only had as much as 24 oz.

so that's it for now. there are more. probably some you're thinking of right now...i just won't admit to them. :P

*I have given up diet coke and all other forms of caffeine (except maybe excedrin) see counter below...**


**update: i couldn't find a counter that starts at a particular date and counts up the number of days/hours/seconds i've been without caffeine. so. i will just tell you. i have been caffeine free as of sunday october 19 at approximately 11am. we're excluding chocolate from this particular endeavor.