Saturday, May 22, 2010

the party don't stop, no

this has been keeping company with the strange dreams in my head.

it's been stuck there all day. ALL DAY.

don't ask.

but it prompted me and kz to watch the official music video in which she looks about 14. so of course we had to google her to find out her actual age (same as suz), which led us to this gem of a quote:

Everyone's really offended by that (the Jack Daniel's lyric). But come on, brushing your teeth with Jack Daniel's: what girl does that? People are like, 'Do you really advocate brushing your teeth with bourbon?' I'm like, 'Yes, actually, I do, every day, for everybody. Especially eight year olds.' I mean, what are you talking about? Of course I don't. Come on.

maybe i should wake up in the morning feeling like p-diddy. would that make it go away?

but until then...

don't stop, make it pop
dj blow my speakers up
tonight i'mma fight
till we see the sunlight
tik tok on the clock
but the party don't stop, no


Monday, May 17, 2010

to all my friends:

now i know who you are.

i kid.

thanks for coming!

i think i had more people show up than any of the other artists (because, yes, this is a popularity contest).

thank you for walking in the rain (10 blocks if you rode with genius me) and battling traffic and searching for non-existent parking and your well-wishes and asking great questions and being interested and showing up and liking (or at least pretending to like) my art.

you made the show great.

see you in june at the closing!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

what i learned at school this year

this post alternately titled "i give up"

1. avoid use of bathrooms if at all possible. if not possible, use in the morning. the bathrooms are always less disgusting in the morning.

2. ABSOLUTELY NO LATE WORK actually means come up with such a sad story that your professor will be the biggest jerk on the planet for not showing a little leniency.

3. it doesn't matter how many times you say it, write it, staple it to their foreheads, they will still do it wrong. or forget and not do it at all. then, see no. 2.

4. art students are just as judgmental and closed-minded as everyone else.

5. never let them know you carry extra pens.

6. the request to write complete sentences will solicit a response akin to that of commanding someone to bathe in acid.

7. the responses to any questions i pose the class will likely be, "the details" or "the colors" (in incomplete sentences).
allow me to illustrate:
Q: How do the differences in these two artworks reflect the cultures from which they came?
A: the details?
A: the colors?

8. nobody cares about grades until the last 2 weeks of the semester.

9. attendance in class is (apparently) optional. if one absolutely must attend class, be sure to bring cell phone to occupy oneself.

10. it is always the professor's fault.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

why is danny devito trying to kill me?

maybe because i can't spell his name. your guess is as good as mine. but in my dream the other night, he sure was persistent. he chased me all over the city with a machine gun. until ss discovered that if you stand on top of a bed and face him, the bullets have no power over you. it was all very care bears meets matrix meets labyrinth. of course, in the dream i was the hero, despite the face-off being ss' idea. what? it was my dream; they never make sense and they've been particularly strange lately.

ps. i love you mom. fer rills. thanks for borning me.